Managing Our Aggression


Aggression is good and we all must have, it’s an important attribute to reach your goals . What really happens when this aggression is misunderstood and used in appropriate manner, its catastrophic, derails everything and it creates an environment of mistrust.  Basis my experience while working with different set of people, I have observed, our aggression is more focused on dominating others, having superiority complex or zeal to surpass everything to achieve goals.  People may derive instant gratification but you can’t sustain, someone  more aggressive will overpower you, beware of this situation.

What really is aggression ? Aggression is all about cultivating a fire in you to give the best, best that no else can question and is compelled to applaud your efforts. Your aggression should channelized in a manner to address critical business issues, increasing client satisfaction. Show your aggression while working with people, show  them you are responsible for their career and you both jointly own it. Show your aggression while dealing with business critical issues, handling personal issues, you just to be meticulous in your approach.

I consider myself aggressive but you will never see it in my words, I have practised to control it and channelize it where it matters the most, to our people , to our clients. Never ever fall in the trap of verbal or email aggression, it’s called instant gratification with adverse impact.

Have you ever seen aggressive Harbhajan Singh, when he is aggressive, you can see in on his face, it’s expressed instantly and it goes for a toss. Whenever he has tried to be aggressive, ball always meets boundary. Contrast this with Anil Kumble, you will never see aggression on his face, he channelizes his energies and delivers the best.  If you want to be  successful at work, never focus on instant gratification,  focus on long term goal. Focus on 10/10, don’t settle with 5/10.

Hold on to your aggression for instant gratification, you will see the difference.

Dear FoodPanda, its early days and you can change

Its getting crazier with every day in mobile app world, you have app for everything and I am simply loving it, what I don’t love is perennial problem with services from these app.  This column is focused on food ordering app FoodPanda and lack of service delivery.

Started using it from last few weekends, off course I only use it on weekend and don’t fancy on weekdays. Used it thrice and with every interaction, the situation got worse.  These app work perfectly fine, with so much exciting features, I think they have cracked the technology but never been able to work through the services.

My last order with foodpanda was horrible and this my third, so practically 33% defect rate.  Everything went fine until I placed the order, the fancy app shows status of my order every single minute and I continued to be impressed till it clocked 60 min. The moment you cross 60 min, it will ask if your order has been delivered and if you say ‘no’, it will request to wait for a call back or confirmation in next 30 min or so.

I just kept waiting for a callback on my order and as expected no follow-up, then I started chasing FoodPanda, helpline was always busy and I tried at least 5-6 times in next 30 min.  Having seen disappointed with call center, I started calling the restaurant and to my surprise none of the phone number mentioned in SMS from Foodpanda was working. Finally the order arrived after a delay of 1 hr and that too in stale condition.

Foodpanda has been extensively marketing and giving lots of discounts to capture customer base as early player but guess what, they have forgotten, customer would request for prompt service as well and they are unable to deal with it.  Definitely not planning to order again, my local restaurant delivery guys turns out be more effective in service delivery.

Manali to Leh Cycling Expedition – The Last Man Standing

I don’t know if it was by choice, chance or just pure destiny but I always found myself last man standing in the entire and there is nothing real good about it. You are virtually alone on those mountains and when you reach passes by 4-5 pm, it’s almost freezing.

While this is it, I am personally very satisfied with my achievement, not that I had any doubt before embarking on this journey but when you weigh 95kg, you really need to think.


Our Group at the Talkatora Stadium

Our journey started on Sep 26th, bunch young riders had assembled near Talkatora Stadium to reach the start point, Manali. My first impression after looking at the riders was almost like I being a misfit in this group, within minutes I realized everyone was just “Hi & Hello” away, and friends were made immediately.

We reached Manali on 27th evening, yes that was 24 hrs journey and there is no point talking about it, anyways it was fun with friends.

Day 1: Manali – Marhi

Was informed that first two days are going to be tough and I was mentally prepared for it but never realize, your mental preparations is virtual, in reality the world is different.  I was on the verge of giving up the whole tour in first 1 hr, I couldn’t just climb. Stopped for some time, took off all my warm clothes and realize the problem was actually my riding gear. I have never done ride 1*1 hence never realized it was an option.


Our stay in Marhi

Our stay in Marhi

First day was not so difficult mentally or physical, may be because I had a great company of Mr. Vishal Tomar. We were almost last on first day and that was an indication of days to come.  This night was also my first experience with sleeping in tents and using sleeping bags. It wasn’t easy night because some weird noise outside the tent but I survived.

Day 2: Marhi-KhokSar-Sissu-Tandi

I had lost track of time of by day and it was all dependent on sun rise and breakfast readiness, never realize when I starting the ride and when it finishes.  Anyways, we started riding towards Rohtang Pass, I started virtually imagining the snow. Had never been here and I thought the roads must be like what we saw in “Jab We Met”.

The only important aspect I remember from Day 2 ride was headwind, rest everything I don’t. I know it was getting very difficult for me but somehow just did it, Vishal was cruising ahead and a lot of other riders passed me and there I get my last man standing status.  Anyways after riding slowly and steadily, crossed Rohtang Pass and went towards downhill section.  This downhill section from Rohtang Pass to Khoksar was amazing, had never done anything like this my life.

I would consider myself fairly good in downhill and as a matter of fact everyone is, was fortunate to catch Vishal and Kaushik and now I had company.  Had lunch at kosher, I would probably stop here again in next visit just to eat rice and meat, avoided non veg during ride time.

From Khoksar we started our journey to our day 2 basecamp, Tandi and I was told its flat, almost road like our own GFR. Wise men have called it out again and again, on hills there is no flat road and I realized it next few minutes.  From Kosher to Tandi, it was mix of emotional ride, I had great company but some really good cycling. The terrain gave all levels of challenges and downhill section just before Tandi was amazing!

Reached our basecamp in evening and it was tough day, I had virtually lost everything on Rohtang climb and Rajiv Dubey called it couple of times, you are looking very tired and yes I was.

Day 3: Tandi-Keylong-Jispa-Darcha-Patseo

Good men again came to my rescue, Mukesh and Vishal had plans to take bath in Kylong as this was our last hope to take shower and I desperately needed that. We left 1 hr early and went to a nice place in Keylong for good warm water shower, it took us 3 hrs for three us to take shower and have breakfast, it was indeed long shower.

I was riding easy on 3rd day and probably it was the shower, had no difficult till we reach our lunch point. Met some lovely people on the way, clicked few photographs and had awesome fun. It all started after lunch, it was uphill with extremely bad road conditions.  Reaching our basecamp was dream, things started to look easy after 7 km and were told its all downhill & flat now till our basecamp, again its never flat on hills and I kept forgetting this fact.


Day 3 was first day when I thought of giving, last 3 kms to basecamp after Patseo was extremely difficult, later I was I was told it was the same for all. Anways just managed to walk down last 3 kms in company of Kaushik and Vivian, I just survived. While I may have survived the ride, the actual pain started when I reached basecamp, it was freezing. I tried to lay down in tent for some time, it didn’t help and then I started having breathing problem, wind was also creating problems.

Snow on our bike tyre, morning (Oct 1st)

Snow on our bike tyre, morning (Oct 1st)

I just went out, grabbed a cup of tea and biscuit and went inside temo traveller, I just wanted to get away from cold and yes, I was struggling with my breath now. Stayed inside the bus for almost 2 hrs, was worried about the lack of oxygen in bus as well.  Managed to get hold of my breath after few hrs, went inside dining hall and got hold of a warm corner, it was all well now.  The cold wind had also settled down by then and I had the real experience of high altitude.


Day 4: Patseo-ZingZingBar-Baralachala-Killingsarai-Sarchu-Brandy Nalla

Day 4 was scary, I was told about the Baralachala climb and I would consider myself fool, if I thought it would be easy for me. This was day I was the real test of my body and stamina, last few kms at least till ZingZing bar was fairly comfortable then came the climb towards Baralachala. I had lost it in last 8 km, no energy left now and I was all alone again with sever breathing problems. I was later caught by Kaushik and Vivian, we started walking now. The sweep vehicles started making rounds and I realize our time was up, we decided to take short and that decision fall flat on me, I struggled more on walking uphill.

The sweep vehicle came and we were recommended to get in till the pass but fellow cyclists didn’t give up and that gave me the moral boost. Started riding again till lunch point, that was Vishal Lake. Hats off to Shubho, he was stationed there from last 6 hrs and I realized this was under extreme condition.  Baralachala was 3kms away from lunch point, good man Chiro gave me moral boost here, I started riding again with no company at all and the last man standing.

My face now had started to swell because of lack of oxygen

My face now had started to swell because of lack of oxygen, on the climb to Baralachala

From Day 4 onwards, the sweep vehicle driver started looking at me like a prey. Vultures hover around waiting for their prey to fell down, exactly the same way I saw at people on sweep vehicles and this I say with all due respect, they were doing what they were expected to  do and It was difficult, they couldnt have left me alone.

This was also the first where I witness snow, the sweep vehicle was stationed at the pass and I driver started to walk towards me, after a km he saw me riding, we exchanged smile J . This is it, I had done it and now the downhill. On the downhill section I met two another brave riders Gagandeep and Rajiv, they are amazing and inspiring. I started to ride with me or started to catch them. Our ride was terminated at Killingsarai because of safety reasons. We stayed near Brandy BR that night, it was almost 30km from  Killingsarai and we were transported to safety. I just loved my stop at Killingsarai though, had fresh roti sabzee!

Day 5: Gatta Loops, Nakeela Pass, Lachungla Pass

I started riding with Vishal today and loved our pace, in front of us it was the dreaded Ghata Climb and I was scared, really scared. I was told about the 21 steep loops but hey, we did it without any problem at all. I even didn’t notice when it was done, we just clicked pictures on Ghata end and moved on. The ride from Ghata Loop to Nakeela was difficult but still manageable and here again I lost company because of Army convey, didn’t take any chance while they were passing through.


After few km I got hold of Vishal and Vivian caught up with, and just near Nakeela Pass they both still had good energy,  went with zoom for downhill and I was again the last man standing.  Managed Nakeela pass as well, had quick lunch and then geared up for another climb.


At lunch point Vishal was ready to go and he simply said, “aa jaa ho jaayega…3 nahee 4 ghante hoga par ho jaayega, 7 km hai bas”.  I got my energy from him, started riding again or walking again. This was getting extremely difficult, I would repeat extremely difficult.  Almost 5 km before the pass, the sweep vehicle came and suggested to hop on till the uphill, had the power and I denied it.

On this pass again I was last man standing, then caught up with Kamal in last 1 km.  Done, I did this climb as well and rest was downhill till Pang. This downhill was extremely dangerous and fearful, some bad thought s were coming to me but I would rather ignore this.  Reached our basecamp at around 6 with a warm welcome from Mukesh and Vishal, this stay inside the tent house was pleasant, never loved the idea of sleeping bag.


Day 6: Uphill -Morey Plains-Tanglangla Pass – Rumsey – Lato

I don’t know if I really remember anything now, what I know was …I am still up and kicking this 95kg ass. Started my climb till Morey Plains, wasn’t really tough considering it was only 7km and then we had morey plains. I am surprised why we call Morey Plains, this just isn’t by any standards for cyclist. Didn’t had too much trouble here and yes I had company as well, Vishal, Kaushik and Arjun.  Reached lunch Darcha without any hassles had quick andaa parathaa and I was raring to go. I was relaxing for 10 min and realize my body is giving up now, started feeling high fever. I know my body, when I push myself too hard,  my body breaks and I will have high fever.  The idea of giving up was nowhere, had a combiflam and got on saddle again.

On Morey Plains with Kaushik Reddy

On Morey Plains with Kaushik Reddy

Just after 2 kms on road to Tanglangla Pass, I asked few people about the road condition and they said its same for next 10-15 km, the road was full gravels and extremely difficult to ride. After pushing for few more kms, I realize I was again the last man standing.

I continued to ride, suddenly two people from Tata Sumo approached and asked to board the tempo, I was told it was sweep vehicle and no riders left on the road to Tanglangla Pass now. I was surprised but denied to get swept, I continued to ride and my speed was now 3kmph. After 2-3 kms, the tempo traveller again and asked to get on till pass, I denied again. They stopped to have a chat, said, everyone has reached pass and Vishal was waiting ahead to board the bus and I must give up because of safety reasons and Yes I did then, no further question. I was following Vishal on this expedition and if he had given then I had no hope.

Got into bus, just after 1.5 km I realize Vishal is still riding and the sweep vehicle was asking him to board and he continued to refuse and I was shocked, I still had a brave rider out there. Immediately asked the vehicle to stop, got my bike out and I was there again. Vishal simply told, follow me, we will get through it.  I couldn’t realy catch Vishal but yes, I did complete the pass. Just before 200m the pass I stopped and prayed to god, let me get over this. It was 6 P.M and I was still riding on Tanglangla Pass.

It’s done, I was never so happy in my life….yes I had all the passes and I shared this happiness with Vishal while we took the downhill journey.

Day 7: Lato – Mari – Leh

Fairly easy day in comparison to all others days, in fact first few kms were perfect picturesque road to ride and we decided to click lots of pictures.  I also loved the road because we crossed with Trishul regiment, I had never see a military establishment so close.  We stopped over at Mari for our lunch and after 4 I had cellular network, spoke to Shaily!

Somewhere between Mari and Leh

Somewhere between Mari and Leh

Ride from Mari to Leh was again beautiful, lots of monastery on the ways and it was all going fine till the end, the real pain on the last day was last 2 kms, it was uphill climb 🙂

Its done, wasn't it easy...I told you this!

Its done, wasn’t it easy…I told you this!

Request to Health and HRD Ministry Of India Regarding CPR and First Aid Training

Dear Health and HRD Minister,

Apologies if I opted an incorrect channel or addressing both the departments at same time but as per my understanding this effort requires coordinated effort on multiple accounts.

My family was recently involved in saving two accident victims  and we got outstanding word of encouragement from general public and hopefully have inspired many to come forward and help accident victims. The narrative of our effort is outlined below. This post has more than 3500 shares and approx 10,000 so we can understand the impact of this message. At the same time, I equally worried on appropriate procedure not being followed while helping accidents victims.

“While coming back from Delhi yesterday around 1 A.M, Shaily and I saw a girl and a boy lying on street, they had met an accident near Thyagraj Stadium. I stopped immediately to take a look, the accident must have happened just 2-3 min ago, they were on bike in all probability it was over speeding and yes no helmet. Their clothes were also casual so it was fatal joy ride for young lads.

While we stopped, a local boy was making call to 100 and telling about the exact location, both of them were bleeding heavily and unable to speak. More people stopped and more ideas started coming in, still no sight of PCR or Ambulance and I personally wasn’t able to decide on how to help. I am not trained in paramedics and I am told it’s not advised to lift or touch accident victims, you never know which part of body is really injured, and you may end of escalating things.

With still no sight of police and ambulance, I took a decision of taking them to hospital. My assessment, they were out of danger but bleeding heavily, boy was completely unconscious and girl started to point finger towards her rib, Shaily tried to understand that and we realized the ribs had broken and it was popping out.

Without thinking much now, I asked people to help me and got the boy in my car and started looking for someone else to get the girl, NO ONE …ultimately got both of them in the car. A young lad helped me out of this and brought water bottles.

My destination was AIIMS TRAUMA Center and I had no clue where it’s, rushed to main AIISMS hospital first and was guided further. Near Safdurjang hospital, spoke to PCR and they were quick. The drove in front us with all lights on so that we get clear passage. Reached AIIMS around 1:30, with the help of staff got them inside. Few little hiccup inside but really happy with how Trauma Center staff reacted when I told them I don’t know these individuals. They started treating and I was simply asked to complete the registration formality. In the process, several people including police man told me, you did good and nothing to worry, and it was up to me if I wanted to give information. I simply got them registered and gave it to doctors, they happily asked me to leave. The last I heard, girl had spoken, her name was Sandhaya. While I was dealing with this Shaily and Shaurya were waiting patiently outside hospital, we reached home around 3 A.M.

Sharing this as I want people to know, helping accident victims is not a problem, hospitals & policemen will help you ease the process and will appreciate your work. “


–  – – – – – – – – –  – —  — – – – – — – – – –  — – –  — – –  — – – – –  —  — –  – – — – – – –  — — – – – – – – –  –
While I take pride in what my effort and truly overwhelmed by support, I was equally worried about the overall situation on lack of training which I expressed in my note as well. Its also alarming that common notion people have in India around helping accident victims and that may be because of multiple and few out of control.
A report published in TOI indicates ” Ninety-three percent of people are reluctant to help an accident victim due to the fear of ‘legal hassles’, found a survey conducted across Mumbai, Delhi, Bangalore, Kolkata and Ahmedabad.
Through this request I would request intervention from both the departments on several aspects. My point by point suggestions are listed below.
  • Better communication to citizens  around helping accident victims is not an hassle, probably government should publicize Do’s/Dont’s in public forum, streets and every where possible.
  • We should do a formal training on CPR and First Aid, make id mandatory learning session for students in 10th Grade and above
  • Why cant we have learning module by GOI on First Aids, probably cover the basics of Paramedics.
The list can notched up by many other points but I would like to stick to the basics and core. Awaiting your positive response. I am not qualified enough to suggest a policy framework but confident enough that we have the right set of people to take it forward.
Thanks you,
Sincere Citizen Of India
Manish Singh

The Flag In Night


The Special Chutney with Pyaz Ke Pakode

Pyaz ke pakode and its super, of course home cooked. What really makes the diffeence is topping/sides and that chutney is special, preparation is very simple…lahsoon, tamatar and haree mirch, all raw, need more flavour…add kacha aam!


The drama is apt for Saas Bahu serial

The nation may not have seen this level of drama company ever or if the common citizen wants, they must see this drama for 5 years, vote them to power.  We couldn’t get enough drama in 49 days as it termed out to be one episode, we need a full-fledged rhetorical movie.

The recent instance of this drama is gas pricing and tirade against Mukesh Ambani,  in hurry AAP filed FIR against Mukesh Ambani and others, another hoot and scoot attempt which now has been termed illegal. No one wants to defend Mukesh, he can defend himself. The question really is, why AAP, misleading people and spreading wrong information.

Till now, they have not been able to furnish the letter which they claimed is written by Narendra Modi on gas pricing. As a matter of fact, BJP and Modi objected to gas pricing hike.

Both BJP and Gujarat Government have opposed UPA’s decision to hike gas prices. The Yashwant Sinha-led committee on finance has sought a rethink on the Rangarajan formula. Arun Jaitley has made it clear that BJP will reconsider the gas pricing formula if voted to power in the upcoming Lok Sabha elections, read the comprehensive on gas pricing here

Now Arvind Jee has moved and focusing on luring votes, forget what’s happening to gas pricing and driving it towards closure. They are numroius such instances, nothing has been solved for or drawn or convlusion, all we see is pointless allegations.


Is NaMo overshadowing BJP ?

images (1)Quite intriguing to see some recent commentary on NaMo, well, he is always in news and always be. Some of my friends comment on Post by Manish Singh, NaMo has overshadowed BJP and this may be a reason why they won’t vote for BJP because of their comfortability 🙂 or discomfort  with NaMo.  While I realize, I cant influence the decision making or the thought process but do they really look at things holistically ?

AAP is all about Arvind Kejriwal, I doubt if they could win a single seat without Arvind on driving seat while Sonia Gandhi continues to be a supreme leader of our grand old INC party. I have never seen a question in public forum on these later two, they have virtually killed their inner party democracy, on other hand BJP’s inner conflicts are always out, although you can’t really trust them. The same is true for all political parties, SP, TMC, BJP,etc.

On the other hand BJP’s leadership gives you a clear signal, right form ABV days. If you don’t perform, you perish and there is nothing about your succession. If you have, let them prove it first.  Comment from a facebook friend.

Look at history. In BJP, the PM candidate has always been larger then party. This is Modi’s time. He will also fade away. But no one family ruling the party.

No matter what the result will be, it will be very tough for NaMo to consider himself as aspirant for 2019 elections.

Remarkable leaders, positively or negatively have always overshadowed their political party and I hate to draw the comparison but how many Indian know if Barak Obama is Democrat or Republican or from which party does Putin belongs.  This may not be right analogy but leaders claim a space, they are face of a system and they will always emerge out, the point really is; whether the leader can be replaced basis his performance, from BJP..Yes!

Meanwhile enjoy this emotionally appealing Video from Google, #PledgeToVote with Mr. Shyam Negi.

Meet Amrit, The Cyclist, Runner, Cartoonist, Traveller and Finally at ShaadiGraPher

I know Amrit from last few years through a common friend, loved his talent and thoroughly impressed with his creativity.  Requested Amrit to share few thoughts, his creativity must reach the larger world.

Excerpts from our email interaction.

It was the October of 2009. I used to work in Bhubaneswar. After a little over one year at job, I had managed to pull off 14 days of continuous vacation. Most of it was devoted to doing a solo bicycle trip from Manali to Leh. I had started practicing cycling only a month before that. It was one of the most amazing things I have done till date. The trip was about liberation. About giving up after hours of riding the uphill. And then trying again. Because stopping mid-way was not an option. Of the joy of going downhill for kilometers with zero effort. About falling down in darkness and spending the whole night on the road. About breath loss at high altitude and yet the happiness of being there, on my own, just on my cycle. About feeling close to the world that surrounds us. And to myself.

AmritI knew for sure that this is the kind of life I wanted to live. Where had as much time for myself as I wanted. 14 days in a year was simply not enough. But then, I went back to work and kept working and working. The next biggest stretch that I pulled off, while still at work, was one month. That’s when I went to learn mountaineering with my girl-friend. And once that was over, I knew I needed few such month every year. And it was simply not possible if I kept working the regular 5 days a week job. Even if they kept promoting me or increasing my salary. Because I was not made to buy flats and cars and pay their EMIs. I was made to feel closer to the real world. Feel close to myself. But I still needed money. That was the problem. That was the reason I could not leave my job. My dad was not Mukesh Ambani after all.

But from then on, I was always looking at ways to make a life like that possible. A routine less life. Where I could choose how much time I could give to myself. And my loved ones. And in that quest, wedding photography came up as a suggestion by my school best friend Neelabh. We both were decent photographers and turning a hobby we were good at, to something which could generate money seemed like an ideal solution. And guess what? It actually worked. We opened up this website called overnight, started offering candid photography and slowly kept getting more and more job. After about 4 moths, I quit my job (sabbatical to be correct) and took this up as my only source of living. And it has been an incredible life since then!

His work from a marriage event



The ShaadGrapher team contacted through or the contact details listed below.  You can take a look at ShaadGrapher previous work here .




Chai Time! The experiments with Tea so far

Chai Time and it has got nothing to with NaMo’s Chai Pe Charcha :-). I simply love beverages and the experiments are simply to spice them up.  Without any doubt,  the typical India tea with milk is all time favorite, with ginger in winter and without ginger in summer. Proudly, I can savor the taste throughout the date, not stereotyped with Tean Time concept.

Las few weeks, I have engaged into tasting different flavors and variety, it all started with Earl Grey Tea from Darjeeling.

Earl Grey tea is a tea blend with a distinctive smoky flavour and aroma derived from the addition of oil extracted from the rind of the bergamot orange, a fragrant citrus fruit

Lately, I have been grooving on this Cardmon Tea from Ceylon, I am completely impressed with flavour.

Tea production is one of the main sources of foreign exchange for Sri Lanka (formerly called Ceylon), and accounts for 2% of GDP, generating roughly $700 million annually to the economy of Sri Lanka.


Other flavours I am trying are primarily the regular ones available everywhere now and clearly not in a position to review these products.

  • Lemon & Honey Flavoured
  • Orignal Tulsi
  • Tulsi Jasmine

The process of these experiments makes me a learned person and I enjoy this part of it.

  1.  Do not pour tea bag in hot water, you must put the tea bag first in cup and then pour hot water
  2.  Water should be kept 85 deg, I am too sure how will I measure it…but this is what its!
  3.  For tea with milk in winter, always crush ginger to hell 🙂 ..the typical way your nukkad kaa chai wala does!

Finally, this has also resulted the ultimate desire of visiting tea gardens of Darjeeling, I hope it happens soon.


Tea pluckings being done by women tea laborers at a Darjeeling Tea estate - Puttabong Tea Estate ? Image by Benoy

Tea pluckings being done by women tea laborers at a Darjeeling Tea estate – Puttabong Tea Estate ? Image by Benoy


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